The Booms

It is a day we will never forget and yet it was a day we wish we could forget ever happened... the tragedy of the Boston Marathon Bombings was something that hit home for all of us.  All of us spent hours checking on friends, family, co-workers that lived, worked in the area of Boston or were runners in the Boston Marathon. We all were glued to our tv's from Monday to Thursday when the suspects were finally gunned down and caught. 

In our home with a 4 3/4 year old and a 1 yr old, my husband and I spoke in hushed voices about the awful event and only watched the news when the boys were in bed,  well almost...

We had kept our older son, D in the dark for the first day when it happened.  But as local authorities were issuing warnings in our area of a suspicious package the day after the bombings, my husband Texted me to turn on the local news and see what was going on.  Well as soon as I turned on the tv, the bombing images came on the screen and D darted in the room before I could yell no and he caught a glimpse of the video of the bomb going off before I had the chance to change the channel...

What to do, what to do, my mind was racing and he just kept asking "mommy what was that, mommy what was that," he was not going to let me get away without an explanation. 

Oh how to explain tragedy and horror and an awful, awful scene... do I make up a story? Do I tell the truth?

I sat down at the dining room table and started my explanantion (I left out that people died, and I did not expand on how many were hurt).  But I explained that someone or some people made really bad choices and hurt people by setting off bombs (which was translated in his mind to booms because that's what he heard on the tv).  I told him people's legs and bodies got hurt but they were in the hospital getting better with nurses and doctors...  he just shook his head up and down with wide eyes.

How is he digesting this? What's next? How do I help him understand? How does a four year old process this?  What do I tell him next? How do I restore his confidence in his own safety and the safety of those around him?

We prayed next.  We talked about how the first and best thing we could do right then was to pray for the people of Boston to feel better.  I prayed for the nurses and doctors and all those involved.  He simply prayed for the hurt people to feel better.  He still prays for them every night since, before he goes to sleep. 

After that he started asking many questions, where is Boston? Is it close? Who are the bad guys? Why did they want to hurt good guys?  Everything is so black and white, cut and dry in his mind.  How do you explain things that you don't understand yourself? 

We got out a map.  We talked about my cousin that lives in nearby Milton, very close to Boston, but that he and his family were ok, not hurt.  We talked about the people that helped the hurt and what a great job they did.  All I kept thinking was, try to stay positive; try to reassure him that people make good choices too. 

At lunch time my husband came home for his lunch break.  We were going to the Indians game that evening, so he talked to D about going to the game.  "Who do we play tonight dad?"

"The Boston Red Sox"

"Boston, where the booms happened? Where people are hurt? Are players hurt?"

"Yes, Boston where the bombs went off, no players are hurt but some of their friends might be hurt."

"Hmmm"

"You ok D?"

"Yeah, are they going to do anything at the game to help them feel better?"

"Do you want to do something? Do you want to make them a card or something?"

"Yeah, could we give it to the Boston players to give to the hurt people?"

"We can try"

"Ok."

We made four cards,  he tried wrote Boston on one with balloons, signed all four of them on the back, and helped me color them. I was trying to think of what else to write on the cards when he told my husband, "dad I don't care who wins tonight.  I want the Red Sox to win so they feel better.  Can I wear a Red Sox tattoo tonight too, because it's ok if the Red Sox win the game, I will cheer for the Red Sox too tonight."

And that's when the idea of "from OUR city to YOUR city: our hearts and prayers go out to you Boston. Love, Cleveland."  was created.  Because for Dylan, a die hard Indians fan who is fiercely competitive and hates to loss; for him to want the Red Sox to win, was something I had never heard him say. I wanted the Boston nation to know that they have fans everywhere and that we are all behind them and praying for them; that our entire city was cheering for them, the very young and the adults.

During the moment of silence at the game, I knew Dylan was praying for the hurt people. When Pedroia and Buckhowlz came up to him and gave him a high five, and took the signs back to their dugout and back to the city of Boston; I knew Dylan was thinking about the people that were hurting.

On the ride home our discussion turned to the cards and the events that took place that night.  We told him that the players did indeed take the cards back to their dugout and hung them up.  We showed him the picture on Twitter and he said "I hope it helps them feel better, I hope the hurt people feel better soon."  He also told us that he wanted to go to an away game someday to see the Red Sox and see the city of Boston. 

We prayed again before bed that night and every night since, for the hurt people in Boston. When we prayed before lunch, even today, the first day of May, he prayed for those that are hurt in Boston.

There are times when I question if I should have told him the truth of the footage he saw on tv, when he asks me, "how did they get the bombs by the people?" And "was it just parents that got hurt, or kids too?"  It is difficult to answer these questions. These questions and others make me realize that he is still trying to wrap his mind around it.  He had a few night frights during the nights following the bombings and I'm sure they were related to what images he saw and heard.  It is difficult to know if I made the right decision in telling him...

But when he prays at night, I know it is one more prayer that God is hearing.  And when I read a comment written by a Bostonian on the article that was written about his Red Sox dugout cards, I am hoping one more heart is touched just a little. For Dylan, his love of baseball helped him cope with the tragedy, and connect with the people, complete strangers, that got hurt. For him, the Red Sox will always hold a special place in his heart because of the events and this memory that will stay with him, probably for life.  And we hope and pray, just like every other parenting decision we make, that in the long run we made the right decision.

For all of those who will forever hear the booms in your ears and forever see the scars from the booms on your body, we pray for you, we cheer on your recovery, and we think of you often.  May God bless you and give you strength every day. He is a powerful God; we ask Him to give you comfort every day.

We will forever be Boston fans.