Sleeping Habits

Every parent knows the importance of a solid night's sleep as well as the amazing feeling of "alone time" during naptime. 

I am no sleep expert, nor do I claim to have all of the answers.  I have simply read up on a few sleeping methods, listened to the advice of many great mom's and tried to put into place what I liked best about them all.  I have learned that every family has their own sleep routines and ways of teaching their children how to sleep.  I respect every parents' sleep methods.  These are just a few ideas if you are looking for ideas. Here are a few sleeping tips for infants to preschoolers:

Infants:
- Swaddle until they break out of the swaddle consistently. My first baby loved the swaddle and was in one until four months. My second baby only liked it for about two months, he was very active when he slept. But both enjoyed being swaddled for a while.
- Lay baby down before he/she is asleep to begin self-soothing at about 4 months. This just gets baby in the habit of self-soothing started so he/she is comfortable with it early.  
- I was nervous about SIDS so both boys slept in our bedroom in a bassinet until they were 4/5 months old, then they went into their own bedroom in a crib. - When trying to switch the boys' night's and days, I tried to nurse and change them in the dim light and put them back to bed right after feeding or changing them even if they were chatty.  My first baby made the switch within the first week or two.  Baby number 2 took more like a three to four long weeks!
- Cut out the right-before-bedtime nursing or bottle feeding at about 6 months.  Replace it with a cereal before bed snack.  I found that this transition helped my babies to not rely on this feeding to put them to sleep and the cereal often sustained them longer and they didn't wake up as soon to nurse.
- Allow baby to use a pacifier/blanket/transitional object to help him/her soothe to sleep. Sometimes these objects change, but having something familiar and consistent is often very comforting for them especially when traveling or at the sitter.
- The middle of the night weaning.  This is a tough one.  I really don't have a good answer for this one.  My husband would go in with D when we were weaning him from the middle of the night feeding and D had to cry it out for a few nights. With L I waited until 9 months and then he kind of weaned himself off, he just started sleeping through the night but it wasnt until about ten months. My best advice is stay consistent and givevyourself time and flexibility. Also, don't go in and spend lots of time with baby in the middle of the night. Feed baby and lay them right back down or when trying to wean, one hug for baby and lay baby back down, don't stress and soon enough baby will begin to sleep through the night.
- This is a tough one if you like to cuddle, but I try not to rock my babies to sleep unless they are sick or very overly tired.  Our bedtime routine consists of a little cuddle hug, a quiet prayer in his ear, a kiss and then I lay him down awake and he puts himself to sleep.  If he cries for more then five minutes after I leave, I go in, pick him up give him a quick hug and put him right back down.  Some nights he goes down without a fight, and other nights I have to go in two or three times.

My philosophy is this when it comes to bedtime: Your baby needs to be used to a routine that involves things that can always be the same.  You/your boobs can't always be there (someday you will need a date night, or your favorite band will be playing at a bar near by, or you will have to work late) and you don't want your babysitter or husband left, trying to put to sleep a baby who only wants you/or your boobs.  When you are trying to wean your baby off the bottle, you don't want them to rely on a bottle to go to sleep.  I have used a pacifier with my babies.  Some breastfeeding moms don't believe in using them, but I do feel it helps them self-soothe when they are young and are an ok transitional object when they get older.  I take it away after I wean them somewhere around 15 months (at least that is the plan:).

- Naptime schedules I try to keep naps as consistent as possible starting at about 5\6 months old (but again every baby is different): first nap about two/two and a half hours after he/she wakes up for the day and second nap about two and a half to three and half hours after they wake up from their first nap.  -I use a similar sleep routine at nighttime, keeping it simple. I also use a white noise maker and now, as soon as my 11 month old hears it, he lays his head on my shoulder, he just knows it is time, it is like his indicator.  Naptimes have to be flexible, I completely understand that, especially with the second child; he has to get used to a nap in the car or one long nap on Sundays when he is at church during morning nap.  I just try to keep things as consistent as possible, whenever possible.  When we are on the go, he learns to be flexible and we all get creative: )

Toddler/preschool sleeping:
- My husband and I have never been co-sleepers with our children, we are two tall, bigger people and there is just no room left in our queen bed for another body; plus my husband sleeps so soundly that I'm always afraid he would roll over on the baby and never know it.  I can count on two hands how many times we have had our kids in bed with us.  For obvious things such as sickness, nightmares, night frights, and storms our children have tried to sleep with us, but most of the time there wasn't much sleeping going on, just bodies piled up:) With my second baby, I did bring him into bed to nurse him laying down because he was very easy to get to latch and I was exhausted running after two, but when he was done, back to his bassinet he went. So there are times when the boys co-slept, but really, the lack of space and comfort for all of us kept it to a minimum. Both boys really enjoy their own space and their own beds.  Kids are creatures of habit and since we have never made a habit of them joining us in bed or us sleeping with them in their bed, they don't rely on it now.  As a toddler, once D could get out of his toddler bed, we had to teach boundaries.  After he learned that he could get out of bed (around potty training age when we let him get out of bed to go to the bathroom), we got in the habit right away of putting him right back in bed.  He would get up and back we would go to his room, tuck him in and leave.  He is almost five and the routine has not changed, his excuses for getting out of bed have changed and gotten more creative ("my toe is itchy" is a favorite), but we don't entertain him; put some lotion on his foot and back he goes to bed.  We started when he was a baby and it is what we do with L now.  If he cries out for a good five minutes, we go in, give him a quick hug and back he goes back into his crib.  The routine started and the habit is now formed. 
- There are different thought processes about toddler/preschool napping. As with transitioning from one to two naps, I think every child is different and has his/her own needs.  The job of us parents is to listen to those needs and try our best to figure out what is best. My almost five year old still naps a couple of days a week.  Depending on our schedule for the day, what time he got up for the day, and when he went to sleep the night before plays a big role in if he naps or not.  -I am a firm believer in what we call "alone quiet time" this is time D has by himself in his bedroom. He has this time for at least an hour if he can't go to sleep at naptime or if we deem him aloud to not nap (such as he didn't wake him until 8:30 and we need him to go to bed early that night).  Sometimes he naps too long and then is up too late, so it is a difficult transition to figure out and again every kid is different.  We try to listen to his body language and make our best judgement call.  I think kids do better when they have a break in the day to unwind and reset.  We do not allow quiet time to involve screen (i.e. tv, computer, handheld games) except for special occasions (i.e.the Indian's or Buckeyes have big game on during quiet) and then he rests on the couch but that is reserved for the most special occasions. Every other day his quiet alone time consists of reading books or playing quietly in his bedroom for at least an hour and he usually really enjoys it and we get some time without him bugging us ever two minutes:).

I do not claim to have all of the answers and every kid is different, I do however find that both my boys love to sleep in their beds and my husband and I seem to have a system that fits our family. My best advice is find a system that works for your family and listen to other parents when you run into problems, chances are they are having similar issues and can give you great ideas!