Sometimes I tire of the endless list of do's and don'ts I have to teach my child.
It is not ok to pick your nose even though you feel like there is something stuck up there.
It is not ok to strip in public even though it is so hot I'd like to do the same thing.
It is not ok to kick and scream even though that is exactly how you are feeling.

Sometimes I love being home and letting my child be who he wants to be: which may be the nose picker, clothes stripper, tantrum thrower kids that he is. But as soon as we walk out that door or someone walks through my door, I have to morph him into the perfect child everyone expects him to be. It must be so confusing and frstrating for kids; they feel and want to be and do one thing, but their parents and caregivers are constantly trying to make them into the "proper" child they want them to be. And are we doing this for the child? Well yes, by the time they reach school our children need to learn a certain amount of what is wrong vs. what is right to do in public. They need to learn a sense of self-control and know how to manage their emotions. But sometimes I think it is for the adults more than the kids. How my child acts in front of others and out in public is a reflection on how I am doing as a parent and how well my child is going to do in this society. We, as parents are judged alone at how well our child(ren) has formed into the well-behaved, clothes-wearing child the society expects him to be.

Before I had children, I was constantly saying "my child will NEVER act that way" and "I will never allow my child to be anything like that". I am now realizing that kids are kids. They are trying to figure out thier bodies. They are trying to make connections of what the heck is going on in thier world. They are trying to figure out who they are as a person. They are trying to make sense of the do's and don'ts we are constantly telling them.

I never realized that sometimes a child will throw a tantrum no matter how much training you have done or how well you do at disciplining at home. My child does not understand everytime I say no and if that no comes at Target where there are toys all around him and he doesn't understand yet that in this crazy, mixed-up world you have to pay for toys before taking them out of the box, then he is going to throw a fit because it does not make sense in his mind and he is MAD! It is so hard as a mother to have others see your child meltdown, but there is nothing you can do about it at that moment accept take them out of the store and let them throw their fit.

I am not saying discipline is bad or that I won't teach my child the do's and don'ts of society, I am just saying, I hope my child fights them when he doesn't understand them and they don't make sense to him. I hope he tries to figure things out on his own. And when we are at home he can pick his nose and take off his pants becaues he is a kid and he needs to act like one!